It had become duty sex for her

It had become duty sex for her

This guy couldn’t spell to save his life, but I guess the words “beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, and loving” don’t need to be spelled right – she got the gist and they fed her ego – she has always had low self-esteem. Whenever I told her that she was beautiful, she dismissed my comments as well.

After I found out about the EA, I asked her if she could remember the last time she touched me; not in a sexual way, but just a caress, touching my back before we went to sleep, etc, and she said she couldn’t remember the last time it happened. I told her I couldn’t remember it either. She tried to say that I didn’t touch her either … I reminded her that I touched her in some way every single day, whether it was a pat on the bum, giving her a kiss, or putting my arm around her when we fell asleep. It’s funny how they forget the little, happy things and only focus on what they perceive as the bad things in their lives.

My ex did the virtual masturbation thing too. They even shared their favorite porn sites. They had a secret folder on Facebook that only the two of them had access to so I can only guess what surprises they put in there for each other. It is sad because of all the sexting and porn they shared the knew exactly what the other wanted sexually and were able to fulfill each others fantasies. She never wanted to talk about that stuff with me. I always wanted to because I felt like I was guessing when it came to satisfying her. She gave him the manual on how to please her so it was easy for him. I was left in the dark to guess.

So I’m guessing that she only played the sex game for his benefit?

Touching…yes. I experienced the same thing with mine. Once she reconnected with OM, I was physically avoided. Sex dropped off to less then 3 times a month from 2-3 times a week and her effort disappeared and she stopped initiating completely. She stopped kissing me as well. I would make love to her but she wouldn’t reciprocate. She also stopped touching me with her hands. I was no longer met by the door when I came home from work with a hug and a kiss. Before OM entered the picture we always kissed each other good night. She stopped doing that even though I still kissed her. The hugs and hand holding stopped too. I remember one time in particular, I wanted to hold her hand while we were watching a TV show together. She pulled it away and said that I was being too clingy…really? Too clingy Namoro filipinocupid? We always used to spoon in bed while we drifted off to sleep. She began to minimize that by complaining and moving away. Then one day she went out and bought a big body pillow and surprise…it was always between us in bed like a barrier. I grew to hate that thing.

She never sent or shared with me anything like that of a sexual nature and certainly never sent me any naked pictures of herself

It’s strange, but the quality and quantity of sex didn’t change. We kissed each other goodnight every night and when I would leave the house or went away on work trips. She admitted she thought of him only twice while we had sex, but is questioning now how she could have had these thoughts about another man.